Hi friends! It’s been a while I got in here. Today is a Sunday in September, time-check is 10:15am. I have just seen my brother off to the park, he’s going home. His home-going is making me wanna go home. Hahaha, I don’t think I get to miss much of home until I have someone going home or someone coming in to my current location from home. Uhm, briefly I want to talk about my yesterday, by yesterday I mean the day before today not the past. I was at an event yesterday and one of the speakers hammered on the roles our upbringing, family and our experiences play in forming us. Especially our upbringing and family. I’m basing on this two because my brother’s intended trip reminds me of them two. The speaker talked about parenting under upbringing and family, he cited an example of his sister who happens to be different from all of them, her behavior and lifestyle turned out off from the normal behavior you’d expect from someone who was a member of the family; and it was negatively so.
One day after she had done something that was considered taboo based on the family values, he had taken his time to ponder on his sister’s matter because it had become a real matter for the family, he had then discovered that even though the sister was a full member of the family, she wasn’t really a part of the family or better put, the family was not a part of her. She was put in a her boarding school as quickly as she had finished her primary school and she was just 10. 6years later and she had written the UTME and had gotten admission into the university to study law, this was another five years outside the home. During the breaks in-between she would come home and for whatever short time she stayed at home she broke enough rules to make up for the times she was away. Whatever form of home training her siblings had, that she lacked. Of-course she had always excelled academically,but so did her other siblings who had schooled from home and yet they had more,they had something she lacked.
So as a family they had decided she needed to spend sometime at home learning the family values and characters. When she got back from the university, before she went off to spend one more year at law school, she was made to wait. She was made to spend one year at home, fully and completely at home and within this time she learned, unlearned and relearned .Things she didn’t know was taught her until she became better. Good thing is she was willing to learn. And she did learn. Soon she portrayed better character now ‘worthy’ of the family. In his words, she needed to have spent some time at home to be parented by the parents because almost all her life she had been parented by factors and her siblings had been parented by their parents; and so there had been a contrast in the characters they potrayed.
This speech made me do a massive throwback, to my childhood, to my days at home, we had a family friend, like, their family was a friend to my family. Relatively, they had a family to be envied, but one of their sons panned out very badly. He couldn’t even wait to get into the university before he became a cultist, it was that bad. He too like the speaker’s sister had been cast away from home at a very young age and he fared worse because he had filled himself with so much bad stuff that there was no room to get better.
The above analyses would not be to entirely condemn sending children to boarding schools, no that’s not the drift of this post. However it seeks to embolden the place of proper parenting in the person’s outcome, because what we are from the home is what we show forth outside the home.
The Igbos put it as, ‘A na-ama mma site n’ulo ma a na-apu ezi’.
Have yourselves a fine day!